Emily Rubens

I'm Emily Rubens, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist who helps people live more enriched and authentic lives. Whether you’re feeling anxious, depressed, or stuck – I think I can help. You might be reading this because you’re having trouble identifying why certain patterns keep repeating themselves in your life. You’re confused as to why you feel on-edge and exhausted despite the fact that most things in your life are going okay. You do your best to try to understand why you’re feeling this way, but you can’t quite seem to get unstuck. Experiencing anxiety, frustration, and sadness is a natural part of being human – these feelings help us to communicate effectively and take action in our lives when needed. But when our environment teaches us to ignore or suppress these emotions, we lose sight of what’s most important to us. Sometimes, we can figure it out on our own. Other times, having someone to help us sort through our experiences makes all the difference. If you’re someone who is longing for change, I might be able to help. You deserve to slow down and enjoy your life - not simply power through it. When we aren’t able to understand and have compassion for our experiences, the more we feel distant, out of touch, and disoriented. Basically, the more we try to get rid of aspects of ourselves we don’t like, the more we hold ourselves back. In our work together, we can make space for the parts of you and figure out what you’re needing. I’ve found that when we are better able to connect with all our parts, we lead more enriched and authentic lives. In short, change is possible and living the life you want is attainable. I’d be a good match for you if you are interested in: - Identifying and understanding what’s holding you back from healing; - Learning ways to feel more present and satisfied in your day-to-day life; and - Finding your voice in family and relationship conflicts. If we decide to work together, I’ll help you create meaningful change at your own pace. To put it another way, you will not need to post a before and after photo in therapy. When working with me, there is no ‘right” or ‘wrong’ way to heal because every version of you deserves respect, kindness, and understanding. To start, all you need is a willingness to accept where you are at. I'm also someone who knows how vulnerable it can feel to ask for help. I understand how hard it is to ask for help, especially when you don’t know what to expect. You might find yourself worrying that you won’t be ‘good’ at therapy. Or, maybe you’re hesitant because you’re not sure what you’re needing help with. Regardless of any reservations, I can be someone who meets you where you are at. While feeling uncertain is common when starting out, therapy is also a way for you to start feeling empowered. You might even learn to trust yourself more than ever before. When working with me, therapy is as unique as you are. Simply put, there is no one-size-fits-all therapy. Because I use various frameworks to create an individualized treatment, we will have the opportunity to collaborate often to find what works best for you. My therapy approach draws on evidenced-based forms of therapy, mainly Acceptance and Commitment therapy (ACT) and Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). I also draw inspiration from Humanistic (Client-Centered) approaches, meaning that I honor my client’s expertise on their own lives and aim to only create change that my clients' view as meaningful. Treatment with me starts with an intake assessment for us to get to know each other. During the assessment process, we will talk about your background, quirks, concerns, and ways you learn best. Overall, this is an excellent time to determine whether we will work well together and discuss what you would like to accomplish in therapy. Clients have shared that they appreciate the way I incorporate humor, collaboration, and guidance throughout treatment. Others have noted that my objectivity and ability to provide direct feedback is refreshing. Many of my clients report that they wish they had started therapy with me sooner. I have an educational background in human physiology and clinical psychology. I am a life-long athlete and student of yoga. I draw inspiration from a variety of disciplines such as philosophy, history, sociology, social justice, biology, and economics. In other words, I have found that I am endlessly curious about the human experience. I believe that these interests have encouraged and strengthened my individualized and experiential psychotherapy approach. I particularly enjoy working with working professionals, young adults, and folks within and allied with the LGBTQIA+ community. I offer culturally-informed care and I approach each session with cultural humility. I collaborate with clients' often to make sure their voices and perspectives are heard. In addition to private practice, I have worked in other settings throughout the larger San Francisco Bay Area. Much of my early clinical years were spent in community-based centers and schools. Besides my current work with adults, I previously worked with adolescents, parents, and families.