Oftentimes, it is difficult to express our thoughts and emotions because it requires us to be vulnerable and transparent. We ask questions such as: • What if I tell someone and they don’t understand? • What if they laugh or think I’m silly? • What if they don’t care? • Can I trust them? • Should I trust them? Learning to be transparent and vulnerable is difficult but not impossible. These skills take time and are based on trust. As a therapist I would love to be a person who you can trust because I DO care. I want to understand you better and work alongside of you to help you become the best possible version of yourself. I love working with individuals who often lose a sense of self because of putting others before them such as their spouse or children. It can be the hardest question to answer when someone asks you, what do YOU want? When we invest ourselves so deeply in others it can be so easy to forget that we too matter and have wants and needs. Parenthood can do this to us and sometimes so can marriage. We often don’t know who we are outside of those titles. If you’ve ever felt this way, I would love to partner with you in creating answers to the questions such as what are MY wants? What are MY needs? Maybe you don’t struggle with those questions but you struggle with answering the opposite such as what does my SPOUSE want? What does my SPOUSE need? Remember that creating a successful marriage is a lot like farming, you need to start over every morning. -H. Jackson Brown Jr. When I first read this quote I smiled not just because it’s a light hearted quote but I smiled because it’s true. Marriage is WORK and hard work at that. When you think of a farm most people imagine various animals and a barn but when I think of a farm I imagine trees or large crops. I see these big strong beautiful plants that are healthy and alive. These plants that all started as small and tiny seeds. However with lots of work, patience, tenderness, nurturing, vulnerability and a sprinkle of humility a seed can grow to be strong, healthy, beautiful and be fully alive. The same applies to your marriage. If you are willing to work, come to your spouse with patience, tenderness, nurturing, vulnerability and a sprinkle of humility, I have complete faith you will see even the smallest hope of restoration become a strong, healthy and beautiful marriage. If you would allow me to help you get there I believe you will sit back and reap a beautiful harvest after the hard work of sowing.
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