Avoidants don't necessarily lack empathy, though their behavior sometimes makes it seem like they do. In their childhood, they may have experienced neglect or abuse, which results in a fear of letting themselves be vulnerable, as vulnerability often resulted in negative repercussions. Because of this, they may have trouble understanding other's emotions and will communicate about their own feelings poorly. This, however, doesn't mean that they cannot feel for others. For some people, empathy is a skill that needs to be developed through hard work, and it's likely that avoidants want to increase their ability to understand other people better. This can be achieved through therapy and relationship counseling.