Question 1

Are abandonment issues a mental illness?

Accepted Answer

Abandonment issues, by themselves, are not a diagnosable mental illness, though when someone is unable to deal with their abandonment issues in a healthy way, they can lead to a mental illness.

Abandonment issues are a classic symptom of borderline personality disorder (BPD), a mental illness that is known for extreme mood swings, chronic feelings of emptiness, relationship problems, and an unstable sense of self.

Abandonment issues can also be a form of anxiety, which may result in the person being a "people pleaser" or engaging in codependent behaviors in an effort to lessen their chances of being abandoned by a friend or romantic partner.

Need to find a therapist near you? Check out the Monarch Directory by SimplePractice to find licensed mental health therapists with availability and online booking.

Question 2

What is abandonment syndrome?

Accepted Answer

Abandonment syndrome, also known as abandonment disorder, happens when a parent or loved one abandons a child to drug use, mental illness, divorce, or death.

Because of this loss, the child experiences trauma. After the abandonment, the child no longer feels safe and may leave them unsure of if their basic needs are going to be met.

They may not be able to form the proper basis for what healthy relationships look like, which can impact every relationship they form in the future. Though abandonment syndrome most often appears in children, it can also happen in adults who experience a traumatic loss or abandonment.

Need to find a therapist near you? Check out the Monarch Directory by SimplePractice to find licensed mental health therapists with availability and online booking.

Question 3

What are the signs of abandonment issues?

Accepted Answer

The signs of abandonment issues include an inability to form relationships, an intense fear of being abandoned, and difficulty letting go of past experiences. People with fear of abandonment aim to please the people they're around, usually at the expense of their own needs. They believe that, by putting others first, friends and romantic partners will like them and continue to stay with them. Those with abandonment issues also may find it difficult to trust others.

Need to find a therapist near you? Check out the Monarch Directory by SimplePractice to find licensed mental health therapists with availability and online booking.

Question 4

What does abandonment do to a person?

Accepted Answer

When a person is abandoned by someone they care about it can have serious effects on the rest of their lives. They may blame themselves for the abandonment, thinking they aren't good enough. This can cause them to always blame themselves for not doing well enough when things go wrong.

The person who was abandoned may believe that everyone will eventually abandon them, and will not offer up emotional availability to those they form relationships with. They fear that any misstep, including being vulnerable, may cause someone to leave them.

For this reason, they may appear independent and unwilling to fully trust another person with their feelings, or they may hate to be left alone for fear that they are being left for good. In the long term, someone who experienced abandonment may be at greater risk for mental illness, eating disorders, and relationship problems.

Need to find a therapist near you? Check out the Monarch Directory by SimplePractice to find licensed mental health therapists with availability and online booking.

Question 5

Can you get PTSD from abandonment?

Accepted Answer

Yes, you can get PTSD from abandonment, especially if you experienced that abandonment at a critical time in your life.

The symptoms of PTSD of abandonment include intrusive anxiety, feelings of insecurity, emotional flashbacks, and a lack of self-esteem. Adults who experience PTSD due to abandonment often have trouble forming relationships and emotional bonds with people because of their intense fear of being left.

For some, they may block out painful memories about the trauma, while others may have intense flashbacks. People who have PTSD of abandonment are often particularly sensitive to criticism or rejection, which may result in them pushing people away instead of bonding with them.

Need to find a therapist near you? Check out the Monarch Directory by SimplePractice to find licensed mental health therapists with availability and online booking.

Are abandonment issues a mental illness?

Related questions about abandonment

Life is complicated. Finding a therapist shouldn’t be.

Newsletter signup

Get inspiration straight to your inbox.